How to Make Friends in College When You Experience Social Anxiety

If you’ve found yourself questioning, “How do college students with social anxiety make friends?” you’re in the right place. Making friends in college with social anxiety might feel overwhelming at first, but you’re not alone. Many students struggle with how to make friends in college, but we’re sharing four tips to help you meet new people and create lasting friendships. 

Is It Normal to Struggle to Make Friends in College?

Yes! A lot of people struggle with making friends in college. It’s completely normal to feel a little anxious about meeting new people. After all, you’re surrounded by strangers, and it can be tough to strike up a conversation with someone you don’t know. Having a learning disability that causes social anxiety can make the process even more challenging but definitely not impossible. Just remember that you’re not alone–many people have a hard time finding their community on campus, but there are things you can do to begin developing relationships with your peers.

4 Tips for Making Friends in College with Social Anxiety

College can be a big adjustment, and it can be tough to make friends. But here are a few things you can do to get started. 

1. Start with Your Roommate or Dorm-mates

The easiest way to start making friends in college is to connect with the people closest to you–your roommate(s) and dorm-mates. If you have a roommate, getting to know this person is especially important. After all, you will be sharing a small space with them for at least a year. Even if you don’t have similar interests, you are both in the same phase of life and can connect on topics related to college. Start by asking what they’re looking forward to most this year or what classes they have this semester. 

If you’re living in a dorm with lots of other students, you can do the same thing when you see someone new in the lounge or kitchen. Start by introducing yourself and asking a few basic questions to get the conversation started. Keep it short and sweet, and prepare a few questions ahead of time so it doesn’t feel too overwhelming.

2. Strike Up a Conversation with a Classmate

The next best place to make friends in college is in your classes. Most students arrive to class a few minutes early, which is an excellent time to start a quick conversation. Here are three tips for how to make friends in college classes:

• Sit next to the same people each class–while college classes typically don’t have assigned seating, you can try to grab a seat by the same people every time. This makes making friends in college classes easier because you’re not sitting by different people each time. 
• Ask class-related questions–one of the hardest things about making new friends is not knowing what to talk about. The good thing about talking to people in your classes is that you already have something in common. You can ask what they thought of the homework or a book you’re reading in class. You can ask what they think of the professor or how the class applies to their major. By starting conversations about class, you open the door to see if there’s a friendship there.
• Exchange phone numbers once the class ends–just because you have a class with someone one semester doesn’t mean you’ll ever have a class with them again. This is especially true in the first year of college when students of all majors are taking their core curriculum classes. So, if you make a friend in class, be sure to exchange numbers when the course is over to continue your friendship.

3. Get Involved in a Campus Organization

Going to campus-wide events can be overwhelming, especially for someone with social anxiety. Instead, find a campus organization or club that’s interesting to you. These groups are typically smaller and filled with people with similar interests and hobbies. That makes starting a conversation easier because you can discuss the club’s topic. You’ll also see the same people in the club every time you meet, and it’s something you can attend throughout all your college years.

4. Take the Friendship to the Next Level

Whether you get along with your roommate or connect with a classmate, the next step in developing a friendship is doing activities together. Here are a few ideas for initiating a hangout in a way that doesn’t feel too overwhelming to you:

• Ask someone if they want to study together–you’re going to spend a lot of time studying in college. Why not ask a new friend if they want to study together? You can go to a campus library for a few hours to work on homework or prepare for a test. It’s an activity to do that doesn’t require much social interaction but still begins to build a foundation for a friendship. 
• Choose short activities–if you’re tired of studying and want to do something fun, ask a friend to grab lunch off campus or go to a movie. A movie doesn’t require much talking, and lunches are typically pretty short. Both allow you to spend time with someone but don’t require a long time commitment.
• Plan 1-on-1 or small group hangouts–if you experience less social anxiety in more intimate settings, make plans to hang out with someone one-on-one or with a few other people rather than attending a big campus event together. It’s best to choose a place where you feel most comfortable and relaxed. 

Find Your College Friends at Mansfield Hall

As a college student with learning disabilities and social anxiety, making friends isn’t a walk in the park. However, having a community in college is essential to your success, well-being, and overall happiness. At Mansfield Hall, we help students like you connect with other students with learning challenges. By living at Mansfield Hall during college, you’ll be surrounded by a supportive community of college students and advocates helping you through this exciting (yet sometimes overwhelming) experience. From social events and clubs to study sessions and downtime, you can go through college with a core group of friends, making the experience more meaningful and enjoyable. Learn more about Mansfield Hall today!

We’re excited to be part of your journey toward a successful college experience. Feel free to contact us directly with any questions.